Perception of Happiness!

Okay ! After some healthy arguments and discussions on the sinusoidal wave post ( people do read my blog), it is perceived that some people are just plainly lucky that their wave is just soaring high, rarely coming down, while some have more than one's share on the negative phase, sometimes the negative phase refusing to change direction at all.

Is this true?
I did put serious thought to it for few weeks ( while wondering about my own vanilla list). Thinking on these lines I wondered so who decides what is happiness?
I think happiness is totally a perception, it is how you define it. More than just meeting needs and some of your wants, it is defined by each individual and also it is constantly changing through out the life time.

For example, when I was in school, my ultimate was always going into a college, so you can wear colour dress and be independent. In college, definition of independence changed, so now it was all about getting a job, earn good money and ofcourse finding the man of your dreams ( it wasn’t that easy you see). After college, placed on campus was not just enough, wanted to get married and have kids.

So I guess when you want something and get it, you get soo used to your gifted life, that you start expecting more, rather than relish what you have. You just take what you have for granted and await for ‘something big’ to happen. We spend all our life waiting for a miracle, wanting more and more. How often do we find someone who just say ‘I have everything I want and I am totally happy’. There is always something missing in the jig saw.

Now if I look back, there was a time while I was working, I had everything ( I still have everything….almost) completed the course I wanted, had a great job, had great friends, had more money than I could spend ( well spent everything on international calls), had the love of my life, had an adorable family, cooking, cleaning, washing, even ironing was taken care of. There was absolutely nothing I could have wanted more. But I don’t think I was that happy then. Then it struck me, i might just look back at this phase and have the same feeling.

This must be God’s plan. He cant be worried with people going to Him every other day with different requests. He would leave it to ‘karma’ and Sine wave so you have a flow in life, so you can appreciate life.

Moral of the story is basically:

1) Happiness is not just being in the positive phase, but also acknowledging the fact that you are actually on the positive phase - Instead wanting more and more, enjoy what you have right now, every moment you have. May be in future you might not even have this
2) Trust. Have immense trust in life - You are a good person, you have enough good karma from your share, your parents share of good karma and ofcourse hubi dear being genuinely nice to the world, shares his share of karma as well. So life would treat you well. If you are in negative phase, based on all the karma and schema of life, you would come back to your quota of good things

So don’t stop, continue storing more and more good karma. You would need it for you, your family and your kids as well.

Sinusoidal Wave

This is the basic sine wave that you would have studied in your physics in school and college and but did you know that has a big relevance to life ?

History:

This concept was formulised (duh!) by a bunch of girls (now aunties) in the year of 1996 and has been in use ever since. When things did not turn out the way it should be or the way you wanted it to be, there is only one thing that gets you going. HOPE.
Indeed.

Quote:

Famous gyani Garfield ( hehe the cat in the Movie Garfield 2) says “ When the going gets touch, the wise ones party”

It did help us big time as we could simply laughed at the flopped plans, laugh at each other because we all knew for sure, each one of us will have to ride this rollar coaster.

Now to the concept, a sinusoidal wave is defined based on two things Amplitude and Wavelength. Amplitude is the peak deviation from the centre ( i.e the height of the wave in either direction) and wavelength is the distance between two peaks. The super figure below would help you understand this better ( if you did not know this already !)

As you see the waves (in the figure above) are of different wavelengths and amplitudes. You will also notice the amplitude goes in both direction above the mid point and below the midpoint and that my friends is Life.

Now here is the Thathum 501. This is exactly how life works ( more or less ofcourse!)

Each one of us get a different type of wave, the broad one, short one, tall one etc. The positive amplitude represents the happy days you get , on the flip side you are in for the same amplitude of ‘not so happy’ times in life too. You simply can’t have your waves going just up all the time ( and vice versa). The waves takes dip and pushes you quite down (same amplitude you see), but again once you finish your turn of unhappiness, there is hope. You wave needs to go up for sure, in same proportion to your ‘ not so happy’ state. This is when wavelength plays a role. When your positive finishes and when your negative starts and vice versa are decided by your wavelength ( I guess ‘karma’ would have a good effect on this!). But it’s a rule.

As much as you get stressed and angry with life during the negative amplitude phase, when you get to a point of frustration, think about this. There is hope my friends.

It is when the lines of ARR ( Vaali) touches my heart.

Ellappugazhum Oruvan OruvanukkeNee Nadhi Pola OdikkondiruEndha Vervaikkum Vettrigal VervaikkumeyUnmai Ullathil oor Vaikkumey

Now if any of you are looking for a classical touch, here are lyrics of Kavingyar Kannadaasan ( not recommended for tanglishly challenged folks!)

Mayakamma Kallakamma
Manadhile kuzhapama
Vaazhkaiyil nadukamma

Vaazhkai yendral aayiram irukkum
Vaasal dhorum vedhanai irukum
Vandha thunbam yedhuvendralum, vaadi nindral ooduvadhillai
Yedhaiyum thaangum idhayam irundhal, irundhi varaikum amaidhi irukum

Mayakamma Kallakamma
Manadhile kuzhapama
Vaazhkaiyil nadukamma

Yezhai manadhai maaligai aaki
Iravum pagalum kaaviyum paadu
Nallai pozhudhai iraivanuku allithu, nadakum vaazhvil amaidhiiyai thedu
Unnakum keezhey ullavar kodi, ninaithu paarthu nimmadhi naadu

Dual roles

Dual roles or Double acting in kollywood is so over rated. It becomes a significant milestone in a heros career if he does a double act role. Infact a hero cant do double acting when he enters the field, you need to get some mass appeal, before people can tolerate your face in 2 forms.
In the yester years, MGR or sivaji would try that with 2 roles beard on / beard off roles , Mole on / mole off roles. We would see a line in the middle if they both appear in the same scene showing that this was a cut and paste scene.

Then with competition in the market forced the heros to work hard to make the difference significant enough while technology and make up advancement helped them present it better making you forget that the 2 characters are indeed the same guy. Like Kamal in Indran, Chandran, Michael Madana Kamaraajan, Indian, Surya in perazhagan, Rajini in Billa where they had to change accent and body language appropriate to the character.

Now there are some movies of Chithappa (Sarath) and Meena which ridicules the concept of dual roles. It was always wig on and wig off roles.

Anyway I am attaching pictures of a hero who did double act in a recent movie. Remember these are 2 different characters. While I watched this movie I found it really hard to recognize them or see them apart.

So the quiz is for you to identify 6 differences between the 2 hero, well in normal circumstances we approve only significant differences some exceptions are made considering the hero has a simple costume change between the roles.

Now when you do find the difference (if any), put them in the comments section for me to evalauate. Competition closes sunday 21st December 2008.

Mystery of the 'missing socks'!

I am struck by this strange mystery at home. There is most definitely something happening.

After I do my weekly laundry, I always end up with atleast 2 pairs of socks missing their respective partners. Not once, not twice, every single time, not just adult socks, but also my little girl’s socks.

I make sure I put them in pairs when I wash them. Then i take them out to dry in the drier or in the cloths line in the backyard. Then i sort them end of that day (rarely!!) or as soon as i can. I am not sure if its the washing machine or the drier or even the sun. If the sock eating monster is indoors or outdoors.

I first thought junior was doing it, so now I hide the dried cloths away from her reach until I get a chance to sort. Somehow I always end up with this singles.

I have a huge collection of these single socks, hoping someday its partner will come back and they will live happily ever after, but my sock tales hasn't had a happy ending so far.

For those of you who are lucky enough to have happy sock families would not know the importance of this post. For some one like me, who would buy a new pair pretty much during every shopping would still end up spending a good 10 minutes every morning trying to find a pair of socks will definitely appreciate this.

Somedays in the mornings, when hubi is looking for socks, i throw in my helping hand, trying to sneak through a mismatch. But hubi with his sharp eyes will find out immediately if I hand him different socks, even during the busiest mornings. They are both black for heavens sake !
All of junior’s socks are pink, but i still cant find a nearest match between the singles to do some mix and match.

So i have absolutly no use whatsoever with the single socks now. But I have a separate compartment in the robe to store single socks. What if I run out of space (which is due to happen very soon!). Now I need to take the toughest decision, whether to throw the singles or still hold on.

Going Yellow !

Smile is Contagious and so is a frown !





Have heard about the smile being contagious but experienced the smile and frown disease very recently.I work with a girl from the regional web team, she works from Sydney while I am in Melbourne, have never met her and I always go to her only when I need something done. Ofcourse being in HR I don’t have lot of work happening through web team.Now each time I call her, she knows for sure I am calling for something but she always sounds so happy. When I hear the bubbly voice, I can see her speaking with a pleasant smile on the other end. Then my tone changes from “hi, how are you? “ to match her enthusiasm and I was hanging on to this enthu for like another 15 minutes after I hung up.

I met my colleague from my previous work a few days ago, we organised this lunch meeting as a casual catch up, but I have to confess that I needed to re charge the good person inside me and needed some positive energy. She said I wasn’t like this at all. I was one of the positive energy radiator and she could not believe I was losing it !

Then I realised I used to be the web team girl, I always walked into work with a smile, sometimes with a box of goodies for our test kitchen ( we had a table in the middle of the HR department where we shared new snacks in market and we called it our test kitchen). There was MW who would turn anything and everything into a joke. I have laughed loud, forwarded funny emails to other colleagues making them laugh out loud. We have shared jokes and laughed till we had tears and we always always said ‘ if it weren’t for this fun team, we would be depressed with the work’ coz we were very busy and had to deal with unusual, unrealistic expectations from Department Managers.

Then I changed jobs and work with a team , lets says is not as funny or light hearted as the old team. I still have unrealistic expectations and busy work, but with no jokes, no test kitchen, no light hearted colleagues, it makes things harder. It made me sit quietly at work and even start a blog !!!I slowly felt that the good side of me dying and the mean side of me taking over. I smiled less often, never laughed and carried out this monotonous “Hi, how are you? “ and other things mentioned in my “small talks” blog. I don’t forward the funny things I receive in my email, I don’t share my snacks (he ! he!)

I thought well, as contagious as the smile is, so is frown. Now is it as easy to smile and laugh while everyone else is so serious and mean to you? Then thought one is I should not let the good side die and two the least I could to is be energetic and smile when I bump into someone or when I pick up the phone. Spread the smile around!
Now just like a zillion Indian movies where they try hard to prove the title of the movie in the last scene, here is mine. Since wondering blogger wrote about going green, I have named mine going yellow – which I think represents smile and sun shine !.

Feminist in Me !

The feminist in me screams out loud when I see the fate of heroine in Kollywood. Well please don’t imagine a ‘Malaysia vasudevan’ voice singing ‘Oh! Oru thendral’ in the background (which is what KV sings when I start a topic like this) .

A heroine in kollywood is defined as a very pretty girl able to dance. No prerequisite in regards to acting talent or knowing tamil. Someone with all or most of the talents are very rare to find, when someone like that manage to be successful, they are the celebrities with fans building even temple for them. While they are adored to such an extent, before you know they are completely forgotten when a new one appears. The career span of a heroine is only a few years as against few decades of a Kollywood Hero.

The requirement for a hero in Kollywood is very different. He should be a tamilian, or atleast know tamil as dubbing for hero is big no no. He need not have good looks or be able to dance. He can have really bad dress sense, horrible hair style ( or no hair) , can be just too fat to dance or too old to act. The only talent could be his ability to tame a cow or buffalo and sing to them. Nothing matters.

A heroine’s career comes to a perfect fullstop when she gets married, no questions asked after she has children, but the hero continues to be in the field as a hero as long as he ‘can’.

Hero always has a heroine aged between 16 and 26, very pretty (ofcourse!) from any part of India. He can be in the field for atleast 20 years. Even when he has kids and grandkids he can still act as Hero fighting a zillion enemies, with young heroines dancing around him. His son entering into cinema makes no difference to his career. Both father and son can act with the same heroine and infact some of these heroes have actually acted with both the mother and daughter.

When the heroine is married and then return to the industry after couple of years, they end up acting as the sister (usually elder), sister in law or even mother or mother in law.

For some reason being pretty is the absolute requirement for heroines only in the industry, atleast that is understandable. Hubi says it is only fair Ambica, Banupriya or even Kushbhu could not come back as heroines because they had crossed the stage of being a heroine and I agree but my question is if a pretty heroine comes back or rather if the heroine comes back as pretty as she was, why is it so difficult to accept her.

Dear KV for argument sake said it is an ethical issue of seeing a married woman or a mother as heroine as heroines are always portrayed as a dream girl. But if we can accept Britney spears and Angelina Jolie, why is it so hard for Indian women. Infact I think Bollywood is a tiny bit better atleast in terms of the heros accepting to act with their heroines like kajol and Juhi. Some sensible heros, rather only sensible hero Amitabh chooses roles to suit his age, and outperforms each of his previous movie. Well that’s just him.


It was ridiculous having Nadhiya as Sunder C ‘s Mom in law, for goodness sake sunder would be older than nadiya. Surya and Simran acting as pair and now simran has done surya’s mom in vaaranam aayiram. Thank god the father role was also done by surya.
I am not quite sure how to end this topic, as I am unable to get answers to all the questions that raise in my mind. Is it the heros or their producers or the audience, who decides this fate of the heroines ? Is it just another dimension in a male chauvinistic society ?

What is weird is heroines like saroja devi and savithiri and few others acted after marriage and kids, some too obese to be a heroines. They were accepted and this was in the baby boomers generation. Whatever went wrong in the Gen Xs , hopefully the so called modern Gen Ys change this trend ! ( Well I lost the status of being a Gen Y by 51 days )

Small Talks !

There are some days at work when you are just sick of staring at the computer that you just need a break or have just too much to do that you don’t know where to start and you really don’t want to start as you know for sure it is opening the Pandora’s box. What do you do ?

It is times like this I take a walk to the kitchen 22 steps away from my seat or go to the café downstairs this is 48 steps in the staircase ( Ya one day I was so bored that I counted the steps ). Anyway I walk to kitchen in the 3rd level and fix myself a cup of hot green tea and stare through the most awesome view of all ( view of the Dandenong ranges and the busy intersection )

Now the last thing I want is a meaningless ‘small talk’. The ones I hear all the time are :
‘ it looks beautiful isn’t’
‘ Looks like its going to rain’
‘ how long do you have to stare through the glass until a car crashes’
It is quite funny but I would have a brain freeze and wudn’t know what to say, would mumble something and smile !

What is worse ?

Monday – ‘ How was your weekend’ or ‘Oh ! I hate Mondays’
Tuesday – Thursday – ‘Oh ! its only ------day’ fill it with that day
Friday – always always ‘ Thank god its Friday’ followed by ‘ Any plans for weekend’

Same conversation in the café with the coffee maker ( nice man gives me occasional free muffins and punches twice in my coffee card, so I get my free coffee soon)

So why does all conversations in work place around either weekends or weather ?
Is it the same in India?
Does any of you have any other topic to talk about?
Have you heard of anything funny?